Office supply puns are the unsung heroes of workplace humor—stapling smiles to stressful days and giving those paper-pushing hours a much-needed punchline. If you’ve ever whispered sweet nothings to your favorite pen or dramatically battled with a rebellious stapler, oh buddy, you’re in the right cubicle.

This isn’t just another list—it’s a full-on filing cabinet of laughs. You’ll giggle, you’ll groan, you might even send one to your boss (risky, but worth it). So grab your coffee, spin that swivel chair, and let’s make your office life a pun-derful place to be.

🖇️ Stapler Snaps & Paper Claps: The Office Pun Department

This section is stapled together with love, mildly bent paper corners, and exactly zero workplace productivity.

• I stapled my resignation… just for the attachment. (Emotional security is underrated.)
• That joke? It stapled me to my seat. (Physically? No. Mentally? Yes.)
• She said she’s unstaple. I said, “Girl, same.”
• Let’s stick together—like bad stapler jams.
• He wanted commitment, so I bound myself to him. (With staples. Big ones.)
• My stapler’s on strike. It’s feeling pressed.
• She’s got a sharp wit—like the back end of a staple.
• Staplers: because paper deserves tight-knit communities.

• He proposed with a paperclip. I demanded closure.
• You think your life’s a mess? My stapler’s misfiring.
• Office crush? More like office crumple. (Thanks, rejection letter.)
• Stapled it? Nailed it. Except with… less nails.
• I hit rock bottom and bounced—like a spring-loaded stapler.
• Keep calm and staple on.
• My ex took the dog. I took the desk stapler. Win.
• You ever cry over a stapler? Just corporate things.

Which pun made you laugh the loudest (or groan the hardest)? Tell us in the comments—or whisper it to your stapler.

✏️ Pencil Pushers & Eraser Chasers: Scribbly Business

This part’s for anyone who’s ever sharpened a pencil to avoid human interaction. Yeah, you.

• I pencil in dates, then promptly erase them emotionally.
• Lead me not into temptation, unless it’s 0.7mm.
• Don’t graphite with me unless you can sketch the drama.
• You’re lookin’ sharp. Like, just-sharpened sharp.
• He’s duller than an unsharpened #2.
• We draw strength from doodles in the margins.
• Sketchy people belong in sketchbooks, not meetings.
• I erased my to-do list. Self-care.
• The pencil broke. So did I.
• You can’t erase the past—unless it’s in HB.
• My plans are in pencil—aka barely real.
• She ghosted me, but I ghostwrite her notes now.
• The point is… I lost my point. Literally.
• Why do my pencils disappear like my motivation?
• I met my soulmate. He lends erasers.
• Erasers: undoing decisions since forever.

If you’ve ever erased the wrong thing and just stared in existential horror, we’re probably besties.

📎 Clip It Good: Paperclip Comedy That Holds It All Together

If a paperclip ever saved your life during a presentation, this section is for you.

• I’m emotionally held together by one single paperclip.
• She clipped my heart. Didn’t even ask.
• Paperclips: the duct tape of stationery.
• Falling apart? Just loop yourself together.
• He left me, but the paperclip stayed loyal.
• No strings attached… just a paperclip.
• I’ve got more twists than a tangled clip.
• That’s not a paperclip. That’s an emotion support spiral.
• They bend, I break. It’s teamwork.
• Clippy called. He’s tired of our chaos.
• Clip it like it’s hot.
• Corporate drama? Clip me out.
• The paperclip did nothing, and still held it all. Iconic.
• I forged a ring from a clip. We’re engaged now.
• Why does every clip look vaguely guilty?
• They said I’m not qualified. I said, “I’ve held 12 reports together.”

Tag someone whose life is literally held together by office supplies and espresso.

🖊️ Pen Me Down, Baby: Ink & Sass at the Office

Pens. Trusted more than most coworkers and definitely harder to borrow back.

• I ink I’m in trouble.
• Sign here, and also, sign my trauma.
• Ballpoint? Nah. Ballplayer of emotions.
• He ran out of ink mid-note. Tragic romance.
• Pens have feelings too, Karen.
• Click me like one of your French pens.
• Lost pen count: 38. Found soulmates: 0.
• That signature was ✨dramatic✨ and slightly crooked.
• I wrote a poem. It leaked blue.
• Pens don’t ghost. They just dry out.
• Inked a deal. And by deal I mean, lunch.
• You think you’re smooth? Try gel ink.
• Pens come and go, but trauma’s permanent ink.
• I left my heart in aisle three… near the pens.
• My pen ran out. So did my optimism.
• Write or wrong, I blame the pen.

If your pen disappeared mid-meeting and you blamed the universe, we’re spiritually aligned.

🗂️ Folder Fiascos & Binder Blunders: Stacking Up the Laughs

This one’s filed under: Things That Seem Boring But Are Secretly Comedy Legends.

• Fell for him like loose paper outta a folder.
• Filed under “Regrets.”
• My binder’s thicker than my emotional walls.
• Can’t commit? Try a ring binder.
• This folder contains secrets, chaos, and expired coupons.
• Filed a complaint. Got paper cuts.
• Don’t judge a folder by its color.
• Her drama was three-hole punched.
• Binder clips: therapy with jaws.
• Loose-leaf energy. Chaotic but lovable.
• My life is a misfiled document.
• She’s organized, but like… scary organized.
• Flipped the binder and my will to work.
• Office romance? It’s classified.
• I sort feelings like I sort files: badly.
• Alphabetical anxiety is real, y’all.

Share this with someone whose desk has six folders labeled “Misc.”

🖨️ Print-tertainment: Toner Troubles & Laser Laughs

• She ghosted me faster than a printer outta toner.
• Our relationship’s like ink: faded and smudgy.
• You’re hotter than a laser jet on overtime.
• This document’s printing like it’s being dramatic on purpose.
• I tried to fix the jam, now I’m part printer.
• You had me at low ink warning.
• I only date people who refill my cartridge of emotions.
• Printers: making us question reality one jam at a time.
• He left, but my printer still says he’s connected.
• I speak fluent printer—mostly screams and sighs.
• My printer ghostwrote my breakup letter. Savage.
• Laser printers: burning bridges and pages.
• I wanted love, but all I got was “Paper Tray Empty”.
• You know it’s real when you wait for the double-sided print.
• I’m stuck in a looping print queue of emotional distress.

📤 Post-it Love Notes & Sticky Situations

• Love is like a post-it: brief and barely clingin’.
• *She left me a post-it saying ‘ur fired’. Marriage over.
• Sticky notes don’t lie—they just fall off quietly.
• He stuck by me… like expired adhesive.
• We wrote our vows on post-its. Still more durable than our marriage.
• Our flirt game? All post-it, no follow-through.
• That memo stuck like awkward small talk at the water cooler.
• Stick with me—I’m emotionally available and lightly adhesive.
• My brain’s a wall of forgotten pastel reminders.
• Post-it puns? Sticking around since 3 PM.
• I wrote you a note. It blew away. That’s love.
• You ever post-it your feelings, then regret the color?
• Post-it breakups hurt less. Just peel and cry.
• We stuck together—until humidity hit.
• Love letters on post-its? Short, sweet, and semi-committal.

⌨️ Keyboard Komedy: Ctrl+Alt+Puns

• Our love crashed. I blame the Caps Lock.
• I typed “ILY” but autocorrect said ‘LOL’.
• She’s got more issues than F1 through F12.
• Ctrl-Z can’t undo that relationship. Trust me, I tried.
• My keyboard ghosts me more than my ex.
• We broke up over the Num Lock button.
• I flirt in Arial Bold. Serif makes me shy.
• You pressed my buttons—and now I’m rebooting emotionally.
• Shift happens.
• He backspaced our whole convo. Toxic and talented.
• We lost connection. Blame the Bluetooth keyboard.
• Her texts were all caps. She yelled in fonts.
• Typing feels like therapy, just with louder clicking.
• I tried to confess, but the keyboard was QWERTYblocked.
• You hit different… like the space bar during a fight.

📏 Rulers & Measurements of Misery

• He measured my worth in inches. Short romance.
• Our love didn’t measure up—but the ruler judged quietly.
• You’re off the scale, emotionally and literally.
• Measure twice, still dated the wrong guy.
• I draw boundaries… with a metal ruler.
• He called me rigid. I said I’m precisely calibrated.
• Nothing says “don’t mess with me” like a clear plastic ruler slap.
• My ruler snapped in half—just like my will to care.
• Relationships should be measured in emotional millimeters.
• This office drama? Off the charts.
• He ghosted me and stole my graph paper.
• You’re not my type. You’re imperial, I’m metric.
• We tried long-distance, but I couldn’t find a long enough ruler.
• This heartbreak? Exactly 12 inches of why tho.
• He ruled my heart… until I switched to a compass.

🔒 Lock It Down: Filing Cabinets of Feelings

• My emotions? Filed under ‘miscellaneous trauma’.
• I locked it away… in drawer three.
• She organized her heartbreak alphabetically. Mine’s still loose-leaf.
• I labeled our love confidential. HR disagreed.
• He was magnetic… but only stuck to metal cabinets.
• I lost the key—so I guess we’re emotionally sealed.
• Cabinet drawers know my secrets. They squeak in Morse code.
• Filing emotions? I’d rather just shred ’em.
• We filed for love. Got rejected for poor formatting.
• I can’t find my feelings—they’re somewhere behind the tax forms.
• Sticky labels don’t fix messy breakups.
• You organize files. I organize excuses.
• Locked my heart and labeled it ‘HR Violation’.
• Our love expired in the ‘Q-R’ drawer.
• Binder clips don’t hold together emotional instability.

🪑 Chair Shenanigans & Desk-dance Drama

• He spun me around—on a swivel chair and in life.
• I fell for her. Literally. Faulty desk chair.
• This chair squeaks like it knows my secrets.
• Ergonomic chairs: for when your back’s broken AND your soul.
• Chair envy is real. That one has lumbar support.
• Office gossip circles faster than a chair spin.
• We had chemistry… until she took my rolling chair.
• The chair reclined. My standards didn’t.
• He sat too close—HR now sits even closer.
• That chair knows every betrayal and snack break.
• Don’t judge me, I recline to cope.
• My chair’s broken—much like my enthusiasm.
• I lean back in life. And in mesh seating.
• We fell in love by the break room chair—romantic, but squeaky.
• I get attached… mostly to chair wheels.

📆 Calendar Chaos: Deadlines & Delusions

• Our love had a deadline. Spoiler: we missed it.
• He canceled our date. Calendar cried in Helvetica.
• Every day’s booked—except for emotional healing.
• You scheduled time to ignore me. Efficient heartbreak.
• This meeting could’ve been less emotionally draining.
• I’m busy… being disappointed professionally.

• We penciled in feelings. Then someone erased them.
• He said “maybe later” and never picked a date.
• You ghosted me—but Outlook remembered.
• I RSVP’d to chaos. Didn’t read the invite.
• Deadlines pass, like unread messages.
• I blocked time to cry. It’s recurring.
• We broke up on a leap day. Now I’m sad, rarely.
• Calendar said “you’re free.” Emotionally, I’m not.
• All-day events? Mostly overthinking.

Let me know if you’d like even more pun-packed paper trails 📝

Conclusion: Shred the Rules, Laugh at the Desk

So, next time you’re stuck in another pointless Zoom call, look around. That innocent hole puncher? Hilarious. The rogue sticky note stuck to your elbow? A comic sidekick. Office supplies aren’t just objects—they’re little sitcom characters hiding in plain sight, silently judging you while you pretend to be busy.

If any of these puns stapled a giggle to your soul or reminded you of a particularly dramatic moment with a broken pen, share this with your favorite office clown. Got a favorite pun from the list? Drop it below like it’s hot… or better yet, paperclip it to a compliment.